A Man.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., wrote, "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

I would like to share something written by Richard Jones. I think it should provide some insight to some of the challenges we face in our lives today.

Alas, our society is one in which a man is far more frequently measured by his looks, job, status symbols, gift-giving, sex appeal, or tough-guy exterior. ....people are all too inclined to look on the outward appearance when trying to decide what manner of man someone is. Consequently, it is nearly always the case that little more is expected of a man than that he has "good" looks, a "good" wardrobe, a "good" job, some or all of the most fashionable material "goods," and that he is a "good" provider, a "good" sex partner, a "good" fighter, or just able to show a woman a "good" time. It is long after a man has been judged on the basis of such 'cryteria' that serious consideration (usually too little too late) is given to whether his inner man is as good as his public image.

Few people are wise and patient enough to measure a man by "where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." Most people are content to see that a man is "cool" merely when he is self-indulged and self-satisfied. Even women seeking male partners do little or nothing to learn how a man might hold up under the weltering heat of adversity. Despite the problems and perils of having a fair-weather friend or fair-weather "lover," most of a man's so-called friends and lovers will have forged relationships with him without tarrying to observe his character while he is enduring trials and tribulations.

Regardless, the most important things about a man are revealed by how he conducts himself when he is displeased, distraught, or distressed. It is easy for a man to get along with others and project strength of character when he thinks the going is good. It is easy for him to have a great attitude when he thinks life, kith, and kin are treating him well. It is easy for him to be Mr. Right when he does not perceive that there is anything wrong (with him!). And it is easy to allow ourselves to think that favorable circumstances is the best light under which to see a man for who he is. But a man who is always at his worst during the worst of times doth not a good man make. A man at his best gives the best of himself even during the most trying times of his life - even when he is suffering and struggling with the issues of life. A good man, that is, brings forth good things from the good treasure of his heart regardless of the situation.

Such is not common sense. Most people believe that hard times are excuses for exhibiting character flaws and weaknesses rather than opportunities to (show that one has) overcome them. Besides, the logic continues, no one is perfect, so it is only realistic and far more likely that a man will "not be himself" under the stress and strain of difficult and demanding situations. So a man's acting "out of character" is constantly overlooked and forgiven inspite of the other lives he wounds and wrecks. He is a "good man," they say, even though he can be counted on to make poor decisions when he is under pressure or just downright peeved.

...For most men in our society this is a revolutionary approach to conflict resolution and character recognition, especially since it demands of each of us a thorough and ongoing reassessment of our sense of self. We grew up thinking that a "real" man does not take any stuff and gets his way by almost any means necessary. We also grew up thinking that the more imposing, intimidating, impervious, and independent we are, the more people, especially women and children, would think of us as "the man." However, a man who can only resort to aggression is not any more resourceful and redoubtable than an insecure ignoramus who attempts to use vituperation to cloak his vacuity and limited vocabulary. That a man must coerce others into letting him have his way does not mean he is strong. It means that he is too weak and insecure to meet them on the level playing field of equality and mutual respect.

... open our eyes to the realization that true men of stature are strong enough in mind and spirit and secure enough in ourselves to be compassionate and considerate of others even in the midst of confusion, crises, and the crucible of unrequited love; to admit and amend our own faults as well as forgive others; to repay evil with good; to be insulted but insult not; to be angry and yet sin not; to dialog rather than dictate; to be deep enough to delight in diversity and enlightened enough to live and let live.

...Adopting such an approach to dealing with adversity, a man distinguishes himself from the great mass and majority of misguided males who believe kindness is a weakness. He joins the company of courageous men from around the world who are no longer fearful of being friendly and fair through thick and thin.

Well, you get the point. Too long to put it all. Otherwise, nobody will read. [I think I need to start selling fish in the market to encourage all of you to read Haha.]

3rd Day and still good.

Third day today. Not bad. Still going on strong. Maybe because am soo busy with the work. The negotiations is at a stage where we are still accelerating fast into a blind corner. I am not sure what's around the corner. Its like driving blind. I think we definitely speak different languages. And the translator is not every good. I think the client is ecpecting something different.

"Jump!"
"How high?"

That is what they are expecting. While we go something like this...

"Jump!"
"Why?"
"Just jump!"
"I need you to provide me some context. Why do you need me to jump?"
"Hey. I said jump. You are annoying me now"
"Wait a minute. I asked you why. You never give me an answer. Can I know if you want the whole team to jump or just me? What about your guys? They jumping too? Jump up on the same spot or jump of the cliff? Either way, you need to provide me some context. Tell me your objecive. I need to understand if jumping will actually resolve the issues that you face at hand. Once I determine that, I can recommend how high or how far I should jump and whether the other guys, including your team needs to jump too. So help me out herelah"
"Just shut the fuck up and jump. Don't play silly bugger with me son. I just feel like asking you to jump! Why can't you understand me?"
"Fuck you you bastard. I think you should jump. Not me. I got a contract. You have not even been confirmed in your employment as you just joined them last month."

Then a fist fight begins. And we both involuntarily fall of the fucking cliff.

What a scenario eh? [I invented the conversation above, naturally. Its not real - just in case some of you did not eat enough fish today].

I was giggling when writing the shit above. I am here waiting for them to come to a meeting and was told that they are waiting for me. So we are both waiting. Its just that they are waiting at their office, I am waiting at their other office. What a communication breakdown! Best consultant? Podah.

As I am writing this, I just realized its Friday. Thank God for that. I need some rest this weekend. So guys, anyone interested to buka puasa out of town? But you must puasa laaaaaa. I bet you 3/4 of you not fasting. Can we take an anonymous count please? How many of you puasa. Pixie sure tak punye. What for she is asking right now. Well, you go figure lah.

Today, I am supposed to have a leaving do with my old [indirect] boss at Bangsar. So if you see us in Bangsar, you know what its about. I am not sure if Zed's coming. Actually I am not sure if the client is coming given the invitation list - plus the fact that the leaving do is at a pub during the fasting month! Geeeeeeeez.

How is it going guys?

Are we going to buka together today? Its a month of fasting. Its a time to reflect on our mistakes, forgive, forget, 0-0,get closer to God and repent. Oh, don't forget about making those hotel bookings for break of fast too!

New Character - No need to redefine

He-Man. Master of the gym universe. Body like someone who played rugby from the tender age of 2. Lucky got no cauliflower ear. From far like "macam" chinese gangster. Dekat macam.. er.. well.. dunno lah. Only you girls can comment. Drinks JD and all those things neat. Overall nice guy. Used to dream about "whats wrong with your astro?". Just like someone I know. Hahahaha.

Geeez!!!

No more link to this site? Hmm...

Que Sera, Sera

When I was just a little boy,
I asked my mother, "What will I be?
Will I be handsome? Will I be rich?"
Here's what she said to me:

Que sera, sera,
Whatever will be, will be.
The future's not ours to see,
Que sera, sera,
What will be, will be.

When I was just a child in school,
I asked my teacher, "What shall I try?
Should I paint pictures?
Should I sing songs?"
This was her wise reply:

Que sera, sera,
Whatever will be, will be.
The future's not ours to see,
Que sera, sera,
What will be, will be.

When I grew up and fell in love,
I asked my lover, "What lies ahead?
Will we have rainbows day after day?"
Here's what my lover said:

Que sera, sera,
Whatever will be, will be.
The future's not ours to see,
Que sera, sera,
What will be, will be.

Now I have children of my own,
They ask their daddy, "What will I be?
Will I be pretty/handsome? Will I be rich?"
I tell them tenderly:

Que sera, sera,
Whatever will be, will be.
The future's not ours to see,
Que sera, sera,
What will be, will be.

Glad you read the message. That was all I wanted to say. The poem above does not mean much apart from the chorus...