Its been a while since I said anything.

Yes. Its true. A while since I updated this blog. I guess the topic of today is essentially what is "top of mind" at the moment - an opportunity to change the course of my career and life, and of course not without risk.

The current

The current job is prestigeous enough. Being a partner of a big 4 firm is pretty cool. The drawings are good and the job is reasonable. I don't come back late at night even though I just continue with work after dinner - at least its from the comforts of my home. I made my contribution to the revenue numbers and met my annual target within 3 months of joining and the bar is constantly being raised. Nothing bad here. All is good. Deals keep coming and thats good for business and subsequently of course, good for me.

The challenge

I guess the challenge that its not challenging enough. Somehow doing deals that, in my opinion "duh" is hard for me to bear. Yes, its true, some deals are more complicated that others and the chase can be exhilirating but for the most part, quite dull - even if I win.

The other part is that the team that we have really do vary in capability and naturally the good ones are always taken. In the end, I have to do the deck myself and causes me to sleep late at night sometime though I do enjoy doing it once in a while. Just not all the time.

Finally, I guess, is always a question of leadership. I am a leader and sometimes its very hard to keep the discipline of follow the leader when you know they are making mistakes, and of course, typically do not want to listen to anyone anyway. I can be a little bit like that but I influence people to change their minds rather than bark out orders. We do not have natural inspiring leaders where I am and it is frustrating. I can contribute a lot more to the success of the firm but hey, as I am already a Partner, whatla to do next. This is unfamiliar territory for me. In MNCs, you can outperform your boss and you eventually end up taking his job - he either gets fired or moves on to another role in the organization. In a Partnership, this kind of thing does not really happen, so I guess I am stuck.

The need

I need to lead. I need to share ideas. I need to drive people to success. I have the urge to change the world. I refuse to accept status quo. the entrepreneural side is growing in strength and eventually will be hard to resist. Its like an addiction. An addiction to take total control of your destiny. I want to shine like a bright star in the sky. The north star - key to ensuring that travellers never get lost at night. I want. I must. I will have to.

The solution?

So, now a bank has approached me twice. One with a very senior role that leads more than 7k people. Unfortunately, the role was too inward looking. I declined. I will never get to where I want by doing things I do not enjoy - coz you never do it properly.

Recently, they came back a second time. Less senior in my opinion but will also be an MD of a subsidiary company plus looking at strategy. This sounds very interesting indeed.

More thoughts in my next entry. Watch this space.